Are you ready?

Thoughts and Stories……

If my friend came to me and asked me how he or she can know if they are ready for marriage, I would tell them that I think it is more of a state of mind than anything.  Most people look at how much money they have or where they are in their career path when considering starting a family.  I think more than someone being financially prepared for marriage, being mentally ready is more important.  If someone had a million dollars and wanted to get married, I don’t think that would help the situation at all.  On the other hand I think that if someone had no money to their name but that they were mentally prepared that that would be much more helpful.  Even though money is one of the biggest reasons for divorce I think if someone decides they will make it work than it will work.  I think that people can work through anything if they decide to.  It will take some time but ultimately they will get better and better at it until they stop thinking so selfishly.  There are numerous people that have a lot of money and are not successful with their marriages because they are either selfish or just don’t know how to change their mind set from me to you.

I dated a girl way back when that was the sweetest person on the earth.  She cared so much about making me happy that sometimes, even though I don’t agree with it, she would forget herself and serve me.  I still can’t believe how sweet she is but I know that the relationship that we had was held together by her humility and her care for others or me specifically.  I never took advantage of her or took her sweetness for granted but there were family problems that ruined that relationship. It had nothing to do with us.  From this I learned that humility can go a long way.  If the other person takes advantage of a humble person I think of course that that is very wrong.  Another thing that helped was both of us being completely committed.  We thought that nobody could pull us apart until her parents eventually threatened to put a restraining order on me.  They wanted to do so because she would constantly break there rules and so they thought that putting a restraining order on me would end it all and it did.  The interesting thing now is that they regret doing that.  They wish that I would date her again and now they like me and admire me but not after what happened.  We have both gone our separate ways now and are both married to different people but there is a lesson here.

Humility unifies.

Pride divides.

If you want to be unified you’re gonna have to learn humility.  If you get married get married to be together.  Not to enjoy things for a while and then when the hard times comes back out.  Work with each other.  Let down your pride.

…..Thoughts and Stories

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